There's no doubt that many of these directors are, in fact, masters of horror.  Nor is it in doubt that they've produced some of the most effective movies of all time.  The titles roll off the tongue like an itinerary of genre essentials.  The Texas Chainsaw Massacre, An American Werewolf in London, Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer, Re-Animator, Phantasm.  The list continues.  Carpenter alone is responsible for The Thing, In the Mouth of Madness, Prince of Darkness, The Fog, and Halloween. 

 

Can we fault the inclusion of directors like Lucky McKee and William Malone?  I don't.  Horror masters are hard to come by, and convincing them all to participate in a series on Showtime is not easy.  It certainly helps that Malone's episode, "The Fair-Haired Child," ended up being one of the more evocative of the episodes.  And it doesn't hurt that McKee's episode once again demonstrated his strong working relationship with Angela Bettis, an actress who doesn't just participate in horror films - she engages them and gives them personality.

 

Some episodes weren't so lucky.  It seems like a few took the freedom that Showtime offered too seriously.  Tobe Hooper's "Dance of the Dead" had plenty of everything.  Plenty of gore, plenty of breasts.  One scene featured a zombified woman servicing Robert Englund.  But it didn't have much of a story, or much logic.  It was a bunch of interesting visuals and gory excess in search of something to hold it all together.  "Jenifer" bordered on softcore porn.  I suppose that was the point, but it's not much of a goal.

 

Other episodes featured directors that reeled things in and kept them dramatic.  I appreciated those ones, although they occasionally lost their atmosphere in pursuit of their characters and story.  "Chocolate" was an interesting, well-thought-out episode.  I enjoyed it quite a bit.  But it's not really a horror story in any sense of the word, and many genre fans were understandably disappointed.

 

It's interesting that two of the best episodes had nothing to do with frightening us.  "Homecoming" got the news media to pay more attention to MoH for a week or so, mostly because of its overt political message and dark humor.  When a dead soldier feels pain, Kurt Rand (a Karl-Rove stand-in) notes: "Hell, he volunteered."  Then he covers the body and sprays air freshener.  It's probably the best episode, unless you're a Republican, in which case it's the same old attacks that have their basis in that silly thing called reality.  And "Deer Woman" achieved a weird sort of brilliance when the lead detective (Brian Benben) imagined possible scenarios in which a man could be trampled by a deer during sex.

 

But if you wanted to be scared.  I mean, if you genuinely wanted to watch an episode and watch suspense grow into unease into actual horror, "Cigarette Burns" is your best bet.  Carpenter's episode is a delicious odyssey that begins with a film collector meeting an angel and ends with a one-of-a-kind film reel from Udo Kier.  The story takes itself seriously, and the idea behind the story (a profane film drives people mad) allows for some truly gruesome scenes that add to the suspense.  My only reservation about the episode, originally, was its underwhelming glimpse at "Le Fin Absolue du Monde."  But that criticism seems smaller in retrospect.  This was the only episode from the whole series that seriously scared me.

 

I wonder if "Imprint" could've pulled that off, but I'm not sure.  Takashi Miike is certainly a force to be reckoned with, but I thought his Audition was too busy being revolting to be really, genuinely frightening.  I guess we'll find out when the DVD is eventually released.  A lot of fans thought Showtime "had no balls" when it came to Miike's entry.  That's probably true, mostly since Showtime is a cable channel, not a human being with functioning testicles.  But it's also true that only hardcore horror fans really know much about Miike's work, and an episode like his (which included fetuses as a key element) would be very upsetting to lots of people.  I'm not saying I agree with Showtime's decision, but I do understand it.

 

As for the series as a whole, it did about what I expected it to.  It's probably the most important horror event of 2005, and arguably the most important in years.  Some episodes weren't that great, some were, and quite a few were pretty good, but not really worthy of a title like "Masters of Horror."  If you went into each episode expecting something mind-bending and terrifying, you would be disappointed.  Most were noteworthy on some level, but few were great.

 

But each episode was an interesting reflection of its director, and each one had its own ideas.  And the relative latitude of Showtime meant that we were getting mostly unfiltered representations of each director.  With Landis, we got an entertaining mix of aloof comedy and suspense.  Carpenter's vision was simple and straightforward.  Gordon revelled in the bizarre and sexual.  The entire series is a rebuke to those who consider the genre narrow and boring.  This one has everything from post-apocalyptic grunge rockers to silent mutants to settings straight out of Hawthorne.

 

I look forward to the next season of MoH, specifically the contribution of Brad Anderson, whose Session 9 is one of the best of recent American horror.  I also pray that Rob Zombie and Guillermo Del Toro jump on board.  Hopefully Romero and Corman can jump back into the mix.  And I continue to hope that Garris will consider involving people like Hideo Nakata, Neil Marshall, and Bill Paxton.  The thing that works best about MoH is the way it appreciates the diverse possibilities of horror.  Each episode promised something unique and fascinating.  As long as Garris and company keep the roster rotating, and the stories different, I'll keep watching.

 

Now, let's hope they do a box set of this damn thing, and not make it too expensive.

 

 - - - - - - - -

 

A quick overview of my thoughts, with links to the original reviews:

 

01) "Incident On and Off a Mountain Road" - Don Coscarelli - Recommended.

A straightforward episode with some clever cross-cutting, a few nice twists, and solid atmosphere.

 

02) "Dreams in the Witch-House" - Stuart Gordon - Recommended.

Varies wildly between bizarre, realistic, and goofy, but that style ultimately works to its benefit.

 

03) "Dance of the Dead" - Tobe Hooper - Not Recommended.

Mixes the Apocalypse, zombies, hardcore rockers, and numbing music into a really bad stew.

 

04) "Jenifer" - Dario Argento - Not Recommended.

Stylish at times, with some great music, but it rarely rises above the level of softcore porn.

 

05) "Chocolate" - Mick Garris - Recommended.

A well-thought-out story with a strong performance from Henry Thomas.  Not especially horrific.

 

06) "Homecoming" - Joe Dante - Highly Recommended.

A scathing tract against Bush and his cronies barely disguised as a good-natured zombie-com.

 

07) "Deer Woman" - John Landis - Recommended.

The villain is absurd, but Landis gives us a good amount of suspense and honesty.  And humor.

 

08) "Cigarette Burns" - John Carpenter - Highly Recommended.

Carpenter delivers the scariest episode of the bunch.  Suspenseful, gory, and intelligent.

 

09) "The Fair-Haired Child" - William Malone - Recommended.

Malone crafts a dark fairy tale with great style, some unnerving sequences, and a delicious ending.

 

10) "Sick Girl" - Lucky McKee - Recommended.

This episode is a weird mix of goofiness and genuine emotion, but Bettis manages to make it work.

 

11) "Pick Me Up" - Larry Cohen - Not Recommended.

Here's a great idea that eventually peters out by the end, despite some great acting from Moriarty.

 

12) "Haeckel's Tale" - John McNaughton - Not Recommended.

The second half is deliriously perverted, but the first half is dull, and the wraparound is obvious.